We've reached the first week of the winter Olympics and I don't know about you, but its been pretty disappointing. Aside from the half-pipe snowboarding, hockey, and some of the speed-related events, its just been prime-time coverage of figure skating, curling, and pair figure skating. I know #1 and #3 are technically the same event, but I honestly couldn't think of any other winter Olympic sport to put on the list.
I think even the winter X games are better than the winter Olympics. At least the X games doesn't have curling. For those who don't know what curling is, it is a 'sport' where lawn bowling, shuffleboard, and sweeping are combined into one epically boring event. I don't understand how this ancient tavern game turned a bunch of rock sliding fat drunks into Olympic athletes. A curler (is that what they're called?) basically just needs to know how to sweep in front of the sliding big rock thing to be considered and Olympian. wow. Don't worry though. I read an article today that says curling is a dying sport. Surprisingly, not because of lack of fans but because the special rare granite these guys use to make the sliding rock is almost all gone. Yay! Sorry, curling, but even nature hates your sport too.
This years Winter Olympics games in Vancouver have had many hiccups too. One of the biggest ones is the lack of snow and warm temps at the venue site, Whistler. While the entire US has been dumped w/ snow and record setting blizzards, Vancouver has been experiencing Spring. Its been so bad that snow has been trucked in from miles away and many events have been postponed due to inadequate snow. Hey, Olympic Committee, you might want to consider a location w/ a bit more of the cold white stuff to hold the games next time. Heard it might be important.
So w/ the forgettable 2010 Olympics almost halfway over, it'll only be another week or so before we can watch Chuck, Parks and Recreation, and the Office again. To help pass the time, I present to you a proper version of the winter Olympics courtesy of the guys at Top Gear: one filled w/ fast cars and frigid temperatures. They filmed a special winter Olympics episode during the 2006 games in Italy. I was supposed to put this post up an hour earlier but ended up watching each clip. Don't know how long these will be up, but hopefully they'll provide some distraction until these current Olympic games are over.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Friday, February 19, 2010
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Return of the Hachi Roku
If you are familiar with drifting, then you have heard of the "hachi roku". It was an old lil rear wheel drive Toyota corolla that became a legend w/ the explosion of the drifting craze a few years ago. "Hachi roku" was simply "eight six" in japanese, which referred to the car model AE86. The car was popularized by Japanese race car driver, Keiichi Tsuchiya, who is better known as the "Drift King". He had one as a youth and praised its handling abilities and teaching him the dynamics of a car. Basically, it was the car he lost his automotive virginity to. The 86 reached cult icon when it was used as the main characters racing apparatus in the anime/manga series Initial D. I know this because thats how I learned about the car. That and video games. You can always be guaranteed to see a piece of junk Corolla or (Trueno in japan) in just about every racing game at the scum of the barrel (entry) class. Now you sorta know why. The real car wasnt anything spectacular putting out a modest 87 hp (up to 112 ponies in the GT-S version). But people loved it because it was light, easily tunable, balanced and rear wheel drive: all necessities in car control and, more importantly, drifting.So why is any of this relevant? because Toyota is bringing the 86 back! Yup. Thats right! Toyota will try to capture "the soul of the hachi roku" in their new sports car. Rear wheel drive, affordable, fun, and sporty. Toyota is also working with Subaru to build the car: which some have named the Toyobaru. I like the name but the official name from Toyota so far is the FT-86.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Women Drivers
Racing and car, well, almost everything having to do with cars, seems to be labeled in our society as things masculine, things that guys do. When you ask someone about Formula 1, they’ll likely think of square jawed, chiseled guys with accents so thick you need industrial strength blood thinner to understand. When you ask someone about Nascar they’re bound to think of hairy douche bags, I mean mustached guys like Earnhart Jr.
That has to change. I concede that there are probably more guys that have a natural disposition towards things on four wheels, but just think of how many talented young women could be out there trading paint in 800 horsepower racing cars, if it wasn’t for society’s general acceptance that girls drive MINIs and guys have the GTOs.
That of course, brings me to the topic that brought this thought to my mind in the first place: Danica Patrick’s debut in stock car racing. Known as a bombshell in a fire-retardant racing suit in the Indycar series, she recently debuted in the ARCA racing series (it is to Nascar what the NBA Development League is to the NBA), and showed her stuff. Granted she hasn’t had too much success in Indycar, but that’s not to say this girl doesn’t got some mad skills. Don’t take my word for it:
Any girl that can do that with a 3000lbs, 700 horsepower beasty, will get the blood flowing! Hotness intensified with cold metal.
On a side note, notice who was the driver that initiated what could’ve been a big wreck: Nelson Piquet Jr. This douche bag was canned from Formula 1, after exposing damning information that his team ordered him to crash on purpose so his teammate would gain places. Sure, I’m not condoning that sort of conduct, but the fact that he only brought allegations after he got fired from the team for being shit, raises my eyebrow. How bad of a racing driver do you have to be, for your team to consider you only useful as a tool to crash and bring out a caution flag? Yeah, he probably got into Formula 1 based on his father’s reputation. Douche bag. It serves him right to finish his debut in a stock car in 27th place, second to last. Oh, after the contact by Piquet that put Danica last, she charged back and finished 6th.
That said, Danica is by no means the first or the only woman that could drive rings around your flabby beer gut and big man ass:
Motorcycle douche bags overtaken. By a van.
Or maybe a can of whoopass made in Japan is more to your tastes:
Lovely car too. Other guy on the course: Pwnage.
Indeed, there were apparently 5 other women in that ARCA race, though, admittedly, none of the others had the marketability as Danica, nor the speed. So ladies, don’t be afraid to give it a go. We have too many douche bags who think they can drive. They need to be humbled.
That has to change. I concede that there are probably more guys that have a natural disposition towards things on four wheels, but just think of how many talented young women could be out there trading paint in 800 horsepower racing cars, if it wasn’t for society’s general acceptance that girls drive MINIs and guys have the GTOs.
That of course, brings me to the topic that brought this thought to my mind in the first place: Danica Patrick’s debut in stock car racing. Known as a bombshell in a fire-retardant racing suit in the Indycar series, she recently debuted in the ARCA racing series (it is to Nascar what the NBA Development League is to the NBA), and showed her stuff. Granted she hasn’t had too much success in Indycar, but that’s not to say this girl doesn’t got some mad skills. Don’t take my word for it:
Any girl that can do that with a 3000lbs, 700 horsepower beasty, will get the blood flowing! Hotness intensified with cold metal.
On a side note, notice who was the driver that initiated what could’ve been a big wreck: Nelson Piquet Jr. This douche bag was canned from Formula 1, after exposing damning information that his team ordered him to crash on purpose so his teammate would gain places. Sure, I’m not condoning that sort of conduct, but the fact that he only brought allegations after he got fired from the team for being shit, raises my eyebrow. How bad of a racing driver do you have to be, for your team to consider you only useful as a tool to crash and bring out a caution flag? Yeah, he probably got into Formula 1 based on his father’s reputation. Douche bag. It serves him right to finish his debut in a stock car in 27th place, second to last. Oh, after the contact by Piquet that put Danica last, she charged back and finished 6th.
That said, Danica is by no means the first or the only woman that could drive rings around your flabby beer gut and big man ass:
Motorcycle douche bags overtaken. By a van.
Or maybe a can of whoopass made in Japan is more to your tastes:
Lovely car too. Other guy on the course: Pwnage.
Indeed, there were apparently 5 other women in that ARCA race, though, admittedly, none of the others had the marketability as Danica, nor the speed. So ladies, don’t be afraid to give it a go. We have too many douche bags who think they can drive. They need to be humbled.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Toyotathon...of death
There is a car company with a new mission statement: to destroy your existence. Once a reputable and reliable car maker, this company has taken a hairpin turn down the chicane of doom. That’s right. Toyota is out to kill you. Yes. You. True story.
First, they tried to kill you by jamming your accelerator with a floor mat. Some fell victim to this ploy but many caught on. Then they decided to off you by designing your gas pedals to slowly stick and may possibly result in your car flying off a building while you look for parking. Like a master chess player it mocks, taunts and toys with you. Then it will watch as you one day kill yourself when your car cannot stop and you slam into the back of an 18 wheeler.
Whats next, oh devious one? Why not just take away the brakes and make it quicker to…. oh… The US government is investigating Prius brake failures? Oh damn. I guess we won't have to see collapsible steering wheels then, or maybe we will. Who knows?
But you don’t even own a Toyota you say? Hah. Look around, sweetheart. Toyota’s master plan has already unfolded. They are everywhere. Its too late. Even if you don’t own a Toyota, one will get you. You may as well just give up now and let it be quick. Just jump in front of the next Yaris so you don’t need to suffer.
Sounds like something straight out of a horror movie. You know the one where an evil car kills people? Or a bunch of birds come out you? Yea its that scary. Toyota is like a killer stalking its prey. Except this killer is affordable, practical, and everywhere. It’s like a silent killer. And those, like the farts, are always the scariest ones.
First, they tried to kill you by jamming your accelerator with a floor mat. Some fell victim to this ploy but many caught on. Then they decided to off you by designing your gas pedals to slowly stick and may possibly result in your car flying off a building while you look for parking. Like a master chess player it mocks, taunts and toys with you. Then it will watch as you one day kill yourself when your car cannot stop and you slam into the back of an 18 wheeler.
Whats next, oh devious one? Why not just take away the brakes and make it quicker to…. oh… The US government is investigating Prius brake failures? Oh damn. I guess we won't have to see collapsible steering wheels then, or maybe we will. Who knows?
But you don’t even own a Toyota you say? Hah. Look around, sweetheart. Toyota’s master plan has already unfolded. They are everywhere. Its too late. Even if you don’t own a Toyota, one will get you. You may as well just give up now and let it be quick. Just jump in front of the next Yaris so you don’t need to suffer.
Sounds like something straight out of a horror movie. You know the one where an evil car kills people? Or a bunch of birds come out you? Yea its that scary. Toyota is like a killer stalking its prey. Except this killer is affordable, practical, and everywhere. It’s like a silent killer. And those, like the farts, are always the scariest ones.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Hybrid systems, McDonald-fied
I feel like I need to clear up a misconception that may arise from my opinion about hybrid vehicles. To be sure, I am not a fan of hybrids. But my adamant hatred for the so-called ‘green’ cars stems from the people who have somehow got it into their heads that these vegetable cars will save the world. My loathing does not extend to the car, or the technology itself. As long as it is seen for what it really is, that is, a technology to improve gas mileage marginally, reduce consumption during slow traffic, and potentially provide extra acceleration power, all is well with the world.
Take the example of the new BMW hybrid drive systems, such as the BMW X6 Hybrid. They dub the system as “EfficientDynamics” (and no, that was not a typo, they really do not place any space in between the words). Essentially, the concept is the same as one you would get in a Prius, but instead of trying focus on consumption in general, the emphasis is on providing extra boost without incurring more fuel costs.
The results? The X6 hybrid presents a fuel savings over the regular non-hybrid version, while pumping out an additional 70+ hp for a total of 485, and 575 lbs-ft of torque. Quite impressive figures, to say the least; it is as much horsepower and much more torque than a Ferrari F430, enough power to get this high-riding status mobile from 0-60mph in 5.4 seconds, onwards to a top speed of 150mph. Impressive figures.
Sadly, it all comes crumbling down. Beyond the power, you’re left looking at a tall sort of ‘soft roader’ that weighs in at almost 5,000lbs (over 400lbs heavier than a non-hybrid version) and does a combined 18mpg (claimed). Add to the fact that it will cost you $89K. Yup, that means this ginormous green machine costs more than the X6 M, and does only about 1-2mpg better than the comparable X6 with a V8 petrol engine.
I suppose one can argue that this allows M levels of performance, without the M levels of fuel guzzling. But at two and a half tons, it really loses all the edge it gained from having the extra electric motors. Keep in mind that the fuel mileage figures are from factory supplied data, in the real world, I would not be surprised that this hybrid will struggle to achieve the suggested 18mpg. The case for putting in the resources and energy to produce such a system, with the pollution that a couple hundred pounds of Nickel Metal Hydride batteries can cause, really makes no more sense.
In the end, what exactly is this car then? Is it green? Is it an off-roader? Is it an on-roader? I fear this car, along with the rest of the emerging ‘hybrid’ high-riding, off-roading wannabes are nothing more than a blatant exploitation of society’s mindless meandering to the word “hybrid.”
The smugness will reign supreme. Though, I must admit, at least it has some performance, as a car. But still, you, and the world, will be better of with the petrol version.
Take the example of the new BMW hybrid drive systems, such as the BMW X6 Hybrid. They dub the system as “EfficientDynamics” (and no, that was not a typo, they really do not place any space in between the words). Essentially, the concept is the same as one you would get in a Prius, but instead of trying focus on consumption in general, the emphasis is on providing extra boost without incurring more fuel costs.
The results? The X6 hybrid presents a fuel savings over the regular non-hybrid version, while pumping out an additional 70+ hp for a total of 485, and 575 lbs-ft of torque. Quite impressive figures, to say the least; it is as much horsepower and much more torque than a Ferrari F430, enough power to get this high-riding status mobile from 0-60mph in 5.4 seconds, onwards to a top speed of 150mph. Impressive figures.
Sadly, it all comes crumbling down. Beyond the power, you’re left looking at a tall sort of ‘soft roader’ that weighs in at almost 5,000lbs (over 400lbs heavier than a non-hybrid version) and does a combined 18mpg (claimed). Add to the fact that it will cost you $89K. Yup, that means this ginormous green machine costs more than the X6 M, and does only about 1-2mpg better than the comparable X6 with a V8 petrol engine.
I suppose one can argue that this allows M levels of performance, without the M levels of fuel guzzling. But at two and a half tons, it really loses all the edge it gained from having the extra electric motors. Keep in mind that the fuel mileage figures are from factory supplied data, in the real world, I would not be surprised that this hybrid will struggle to achieve the suggested 18mpg. The case for putting in the resources and energy to produce such a system, with the pollution that a couple hundred pounds of Nickel Metal Hydride batteries can cause, really makes no more sense.
In the end, what exactly is this car then? Is it green? Is it an off-roader? Is it an on-roader? I fear this car, along with the rest of the emerging ‘hybrid’ high-riding, off-roading wannabes are nothing more than a blatant exploitation of society’s mindless meandering to the word “hybrid.”
The smugness will reign supreme. Though, I must admit, at least it has some performance, as a car. But still, you, and the world, will be better of with the petrol version.
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